Two Birds

It's dark outside
and I can hear the birds
not singing

they are somewhere safe and warm
in nests
in nooks of trees
wrapped in tiny
tufts of fur
of soft leaves

consequence

I noticed it first when
I thought of you
and that thought caused sinking
like swallowing a piece of ice whole
and that thought caused tightening
like the knot in your guts proceeding vomit
next withought conscious thought
those feelings blew away on the wind
that pain
was simply gone
drifted away leaving a blank space
and there I was walking
in the grayest field

I don't want to get stuck here

i want to write about everything

i want you to take me canoeing
pack a picnic
gather the Hippies
head to Myakka

i want to drift past Alligators
discern an Egret from a Herron
an Ibis from a Spoonbill

i want to sit on a sandy bank
so still
so quiet
as to trick the hermit crabs out of their homes

i want to kiss

i want to wade in cool amber water
watch minnows chase breadcrumbs

i want to gather shells
for safe keeping

i want to bathe in sun
like lazy Snapping Turtles

i want to smell Spanish Moss
watch it swing from Cypress

i want to be inspired
by it
by us
by them

a good day

begins as the sun rises
she eats her oatmeal
sips her soy
I make my coffee
pour the granola
we walk
listening to birds chirp
neighbors smile
nod
say hello
she giggles at the dogs in their yards
the birds in their trees
we find our park
do a lap
then swing
she smiles biggest when the breeze blows
we walk home to a small nap
I work, she sleeps
she wakes, we play
lunchtime comes
she washes her own hands
she brings me her flashcards
she brings me her blocks
she cuddles her duckie and says "nih-nih" when it's time to nap
she dreams
I clean
I plan
prepare dinner
she awakes and we visit the backyard
we snack and talk about the toys, trees, flowers, the cars that go by
dinner brings the whole house to the table
bathtime brings giggles
story time and bed come next
now mommy gets to rest

a perfect day would begin with smiles
and end with you

six. twenty-five.forty-seven

Forty-seven miles doesn't feel so far
when every south Florida sunrise is beautiful.

One constant I've found:
the sun always rises

and today that makes me glad

thoughts so comforting

you came without a question
and I felt without a doubt
a comfort
a comfort this time last year I believed never existed
I am overwhelmed
with everything
with the love I've been given
with the love I continue to give
with the storm outside
with change
with the storm inside
with responsibility
with continuing to breathe

and now there is this feeling
so real
this feeling
that when you are near
I am home

I am overwhelmed
by comfort

and today, pain

lightening strikes the ground outside my door
I dare not go out

remembering your love

I met you as this bird
awaiting her moment of freedom
in a second I arose

you did not change me
you did not create me

you showed me
me

you saw in me what I could not

my mirror

you challenged me to trust in me

gave me the space to try it out,
to walk and stumble
to run, to crawl

to fly

Country Disappeared

Wake up we're here
It's so much worse than we feared
There's nothing left here
The country has disappeared
If the winter trees bleeding, leave red blood
The summer sweet dreaming, april blush
But none of that is ever gonna mean as much to me again.

Hold out your hand,
there's so much you don't understand
So stick as close as you can,
all of the best laid plans
You've got the white clouds hanging so high above you
You've got the helicopters dangling angling to shoot,
the shots to feed the hungry weekend news crew anchorman.

So every evening we can watch from above,
crushed cities like a bug
Fold ourselves into each others guts,
and turn our faces up to the sun.

I won't take no
I won't let you go
All by yourself
Oh no you need my help
When the cold night shakes you like a chandelier
The snowflakes break through the atmosphere,
and melt on the blue breath of the auctioneers and disappear.

Every evening we can watch from above,
crushed cities like a bug
Fold ourselves into each others blood,
and turn our faces up to the sun.

~Wilco

listing

love
flowers
puppies
napping in a rainstorm
baby toes
dolphin sex
eskimo kisses
boyfriend clothes
freckles
hammocks
earlobes
treehouses
nightingales
tadpoles

more smiling than you know

16 days and you have left a mark

Today it is raining.
Today I am watching it rain.

I am sitting at the kitchen table
wondering to myself:

Is this salsa raw and vegan?

and the cool night wind

I have memories
tangled in Orion's belt

they are chilly
and smell of red wine

new
sweet
and complicated

softening
what could have been sharp

I'm thankful
I'm gracious

for time given to
shared with
me
and the cool night wind

midnight

A midnight dance
my two left feet
on the patio
alone
yet
not so very

the falling leaves
are the song
and the breeze
fills

let's discover
if one can extinguish and dance